LYH23: Elevate Your Life with a Smarter Yes [Podcast]

how to say yes

Resources Mentioned In this Episode:

Featured Presentation: Elevating Your Life With a Smarter Yes

Click HERE to find the full blog post on this topic.

When presented with a decision, we often fall into the trap of thinking that our only option is to say “Yes” or “No”.

Saying “no” often feels like we are closing a door of opportunity or making us feel like we aren’t a team player.

Saying “yes” often burdens us with additional responsibilities for which we don’t have an answer.

For many situations, the better choice is to give a “smarter yes”.

What is a “smarter yes”?

A “smart yes” is an engaging and helpful response to one’s core problem or question.  Rather than the dismissiveness often implied with a “No” or the obligation connoted by a “Yes” response, a “smart yes” does four things:

  • Prioritizes engagement (says that this relationship matters to me)
  • Seeks understanding (listens for the core problem or need)
  • Takes ownership (seeks to be solution-oriented)
  • Offers options (leverages resources to give viable direction)

Click HERE to see some practical examples of using a “smarter yes” at work and at home.

When presented with a question or concern, (rather than simply saying “yes” or “no”) here are three tips on how to take your life to the next level with a “smarter yes”

  • Listen carefully to discern the fundamental problem that is behind the question (what does this person need?) – remember that the need may be psychological and/or physical
  • Look for effective solutions that empower the person
  • List 2-3 options, if at all possible (while identifying which one you recommend and why)

Leave a comment and give me some examples of how you have successfully used the “smarter yes” in your own journey. What makes it difficult?

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How To Elevate Your Life with a “Smarter Yes”

We live in a noisy world. Everywhere you turn there it is. Noise vying for your attention. Noise at home as the spouse and children place demands on you. Noise at work as the co-workers and supervisors push you to the brink. Noise at church as ministry commitments progressively encroach on your discretionary time. You want to be great at home, work, church, and in your community commitments. But, it feels overwhelming. You thought it was just going to be for a season. But, one season just rolls into another one. Now, you’re burning out physically and emotionally. You feel depleted—not sure how much longer you can keep going. People think you’re superhuman. But, you know you need better boundaries. It’s hard though because it’s hard to say ‘No’ out of a visceral fear of what might be lost. Your answer may simply lie in learning a smarter yes.

The noise is a direct outgrowth of our busyness. Busyness has been, in fact, the status symbol of the 21st century—particularly among the baby boom generation. We wear it like a badge of honor. We behave as if the person with the busiest calendar must be the most important—the most valued. My calendar is fuller than yours—with each engagement feeling like an affirmation to our ego or bank account.

You can see it even in our standard greetings as we add ‘…just crazy busy’ to whatever status we report. Despite the fatigue we may feel physically, our minds tell us that to be busy is to be needed and important. We feel like our life is counting for something. So, we live in this ironic conundrum—pursuing busyness while seeking shelter from the noise.

Yes, I’m guilty!