Category Archives: Leadership

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The Forrest Gump Guide to Authenticity

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I love movies. In fact, movie watching has been a favorite hobby of mine for many years. In a true testament to how fast time flies, I recently realized that one of my favorite movies, Forrest Gump, celebrated its twentieth anniversary just this past year (2014). That is certainly hard to believe. This unorthodox romantic-comedy-drama  chronicles the coming of age story of Forrest Gump (played by actor Tom Hanks) who doesn’t realize that he is mentally “disadvantaged” according to societal conventions. His uncanny optimism, encouraged from a young age by the unwavering positivity of his mom, led him on an amazing journey that influenced the lives of everyone with whom he came in contact.

What made Forrest Gump the blockbuster that was the top grossing film in North America that year and still ranks in iMDB as the 13th best movie of all time? What is it about this low I.Q. hero’s story that captured Best Actor, Best Director, and the vaunted price of Best Picture that year? In 2011, what the Library of Congress to select Forrest Gump for preservation in the United States National Film Registry as being “culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant”.

The Face of Authenticity

There are many reasons for its success including excellent actors, a creative story (which at the time I didn’t know was actually based on the 1986 novel by Winston Groom), and several really signature sound bytes that still carry a punch even twenty years later. But, I believe there is one other factor that propelled Forrest Gump into the record books and cemented its place in American movie lore.

That reason is authenticity.

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LYH43: The Day “I” Died: 5 Affirmations to Live God’s Will [PODCAST]

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You can find the full blog post on this topic at haroldarnold.com/idied

“Don’t doubt in the dark what God gives you in the light.” – anonymous

Pastor Rick Warren starts his NY Times bestselling book, “The Purpose-driven life” (affiliate link) with what for me has become one of the most influential sentences ever written. It goes like this “It’s not about you.”  This timeless book challenges me to re-orient the starting point of my dreams from my own happiness to God’s pleasure. For me, that has changed everything—a turning point. That was the day “I” died.

My “I” (and yours) has to die because it stands between you and God’s will for you. Here are a few examples:

  • “I” focuses on himself as the starting point.
  • “I” sets self-serving goals—intended to stroke his ego.
  • ”I” defines his own parameters for success—based on his own aspirations.
  • “I” misses or rather ignores Pastor Rick Warren’s assertion that it isn’t about him because it threatens his very existence.
  • The frustration, desperation, anxiety in my life (and you in yours) are the work of “I”.

But, here are the five daily affirmations to bury your “I”.

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The Day “I” Died: 5 Daily Affirmations to Live God’s Will

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Pastor Rick Warren starts his NY Times bestselling book, “The Purpose-driven life” (affiliate link) with what for me has become one of the most influential sentences ever written. It goes like this “It’s not about you.”  This timeless book challenges me to re-orient the starting point of my dreams from my own happiness to God’s pleasure. For me, that has changed everything—a turning point. That was the day “I” died.

The Day I Died

For many years, I have desired to be a person that positively influences the lives of those around me. I pursued a graduate degree in Marriage and Family Therapy to understand how to give hope to marriages and families in crisis. I wanted to be a voice for hope. I wanted to challenge families  to tap into the internal and external resources to save a marriage, improve their parenting skills, or help establish a more nurturing family climate. I wanted to help the family.

After finishing my graduate degree in Marriage and Family Therapy, I went on to complete my doctorate in Psychology. I had long wanted to earn a Ph.D. Here was my opportunity to pursue that dream. The day I graduated was one of the most satisfying and proud days of my life. I had dreamed about that day for a long time. I felt empowered.

In addition to the intrinsic satisfaction  of attaining the degree, I envisioned the doors that it would open for me. I wanted to be seen as an authority figure on the subject of relationships, organizational culture, and leadership.

I wanted to help organizations establish more relational cultures. I wanted to show teams how to leverage cross-cultural strengths to become high performance teams. I wanted to consult with profit and non-profit organizations on how develop more family-friendly cultures.

With these graduate degrees in my rearview mirror, I set out to write my first book, Marriage ROCKS for Christian Couples. I wanted to document my own model for helping couples see the connection between the spiritual and relational aspects of their marriage. I wanted them to understand marriage as a sacrament. Though there are tons of marriage self-help books on the shelves, I believe I had something unique to share. I wanted to help Christian couples better leverage their spiritual identity to improve their marriage. I wanted to help Christian marriages learn to thrive.

In the years since, I have conducted countless workshops and seminars. I have written dozens of articles. I have appeared on numerous television and radio programs. I have tried to approach every one of these endeavors with a a spirit of excellence. I have given what I felt was my best. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I felt like I had done as much as I could. But, the doors that I though would fly open didn’t even crack. The book that I thought would sell itself, has barely registered on the radar.

Something was amiss. I’ve frustratingly wondered to myself “what am I doing wrong?”

Affirmations from the Graveyard

“Don’t doubt in the dark what God gives you in the light.” – anonymous

The course of events that I described took place over the course of more than fifteen years. You might read that journey and see a lot of success. That is true. Certainly, I am quite proud of my efforts.

But, when I’m most honest, I can admit the frustration. I don’t feel like a failure. But, I can acknowledge that I often feel “a day late and a dollar short”. I am fearful that my life will fall short of its potential.

If you glance back at the first six paragraphs of this article, you will see the pronoun “I” a total of twenty-seven times. Yes, twenty-seven.

“I” focuses on himself as the starting point.

“I” sets self-serving goals—intended to stroke his ego.

”I” defines his own parameters for success—based on his own aspirations.

“I” misses or rather ignores Pastor Rick Warren’s assertion that it isn’t about him because it threatens his very existence.

The frustration, desperation, anxiety in my life (and you in yours) are the work of “I”.

When considering my own purpose-driven life, I can see that I am at my very best when I destroy my “I”—when my “I” dies.

God has you and me here to pursue His intentions for our lives. God desires to replace our “I” with His will.

Indeed, Jesus models this for us in Luke 22:42 as he speaks to the Father as his sacrificial death is imminent. “Father, if you are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.”

Jesus’ own “I” sought to avoid the suffering. But, Jesus firmly establishes that God’s will takes priority over his “I”. Jesus’ “I” died that night in the Mount of Olives as he prayed to the Father.

Certainly, if even Jesus has to slay his “I”, so much more so must we.

For me, the battle with “I” continues. I must continually struggle with him to pursue God’s design for my life with a spirit of joy and expectation. It’s a daily battle.

Today, I push through the iron gates of the graveyard one more time. For me, it is a familiar scene. I was just here, yesterday in fact.

But, today is another struggle—different yet somehow the same.

Again, I must bury my “I”.

I’ve learned the routine—just five affirmations will do the trick. But, sometimes they are so hard to really believe. Really hard.

Despite the resistance, here I go.

Five Affirmations to Live God’s Will

  • Affirmation #1: “God, I trust you to direct my path. Today, I will believe in what I do not yet see.”
  • Affirmation #2: “My gifts do not belong to me. My creator entrusts them to my care. Today, I will sow the best of my gifts and be content with the fruit that appear.”
  • Affirmation #3: “Within me is a wellspring of hope that flows from a divine source. Today, I will drink from that fountain and lovingly share it with my neighbor.”
  • Affirmation #4: “I rely on God, not myself or others, to be my daily bread.”
  • Affirmation #5: “It’s not about me. It’s about the God in me.”

With a heart of belief, the deed is done.

I can once again leave this austere place, content that my “I” is buried.

I leave here with the confidence that God is using me as an instrument of His will.

Yes, His will be done.

But, yes, I know. Tomorrow is another day. I’ll be back.

Today, however, I’ve made a difference. My “I” is slain.

How about yours? I’d love to get your comments. Please SHARE if you find this helpful.

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LYH42: 3 Keys to Wealth in the New Economy [PODCAST]

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You can find the full blog post on this topic at haroldarnold.com/neweconomy

In the 21st century, wealth is no longer measured in money—not really. Rather, wealth today is measured by Influence. It is the currency of our age.  Your influence depends on the vitality of your message, the force of your personality, and the boldness of your imagination. But, the incalculable wealth of extraordinary influence is reserved for those with three additional masteries—the ability to listen, to love, and to lead.

With simple planning, your book can be made available to most of the world through Amazon’s CreateSpace. Your film can be viewed by tens of thousands on YouTube. Your music can be heard by globally on SoundCloud.<

You are the only gatekeeper that matters. Do you have what it takes?

3 Keys to Creating Wealth in the Influence Economy

  • Key #1: Listen: Follow the Sound of Passion
  • Key #2: Love: Care for Your Community
  • Key #3: Lead: A.I.M. 
    • Amplify the Strengths of Others
    • Innovate Your Success
    • Monetize Your Message

Check out the blog post HERE to see the action steps you can take for each lesson.

Please do me a huge favor and click HERE to go to iTunes and leave me a rating and review. It will only take 2 minutes of your time. And, it means so much to me. And, just for you, I’ll give you a shout out on the next show.

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3 Keys to Unlock Your Wealth in the New Economy

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In the 21st century, wealth is no longer measured in money—not really. Rather, wealth today is measured by Influence. It is the currency of our age. Arguably, that has been the case in every century. But, now things are different. Today, extraordinary influence is no longer reserved for a privileged few—no longer the exclusive domain of the rich or well-connected. Thank God. Their monopolistic reign is over. Now, it’s your time.

influence economy

Influence is no longer dictated by media moguls, political pundits, and exclusive societies. Today, influence is available to everyone who wants to positively impact lives at home, work, church, and across the global community. Your influence depends on the vitality of your message, the force of your personality, and the boldness of your imagination. But, the incalculable wealth of extraordinary influence is reserved for those with three additional masteries—the ability to listen, to love, and to lead.

Influence is Wealth

Financially wealthy individuals are different than those of us with more modest means. They think differently. The wealthiest individuals pedal influence not money. They understand that it isn’t the money that creates the power. It is the power and influence that create the money.

Those among the upper financial echelon know that true power lies in the breadth of one’s influence. For them, money is simply a byproduct of such influence. This is an important distinction because it determines one’s starting point. The wealthy focus on solidifying their base of influence—often taking on substantial “risks” to do so. The rest of us attempt to first establish a solid financial footing—only to be frustrated by the way expenses always seem to outpace the revenue.

Because influence is their starting point, the wealthiest individuals don’t think about risk like the rest of us. Rather than thinking of money as a finite resource to be conserved, the wealthiest individuals believe there is an almost inexhaustible supply. Money can be created—not with a printing press but with access to influential people, places, and things.

This quid pro quo exchange among the traditional influencers left the rest of us outside of the gate looking in—wishing, waiting, and wondering when, if ever, our time would come. When would the gatekeepers give us a shot?